Do you want to excel at what you do in life? If YES, it might interest you to know that your academic prowess and credentials pale in significance when compared to the Emotional Intelligence you possess.
I recently read Why You Need Emotional Intelligence to Succeed (click to read) by Travis Bradberry on Success.com, and the contents resonated greatly with me based on my own knowledge and experiences on the subject over the past decade.
In this article I share some tips based on my study and application of this concept, since my mother gave me a copy of Daniel Goleman’s groundbreaking bestseller omn the subject as a birthday gift in 2005.
1. EI is not set at birth (unlike academic intelligence’s IQ), and as such can be improved via conscious effort.
In other words, EI can be taught and learned – but mostly, in my experience, by doing – not in the classroom.
2. EI has several dimensions, and people who demonstrate the greatest degree of EI are often those able to achieve mastery in majority of those dimensions.
I discuss two of those dimensions that I consider most critical in the rest of this article.
A. Delayed gratification
The ability tp put off or delay satisfying certain secondary needs in order to dedicate one’s time, efforts and resources to achieve a valued goal(s) is often a pointer to a person’s degree of EI.
A survey done of a group of kids in school required them to choose between getting a gift instantl for carrying out an assigned task, and waiting several weeks to get a bigger but unspecified reward.
Most of the kids chose to “cash in” immediately. Years later when all the kids had left school, and become working adults, the researcher found that those who had chosen to wait longer to get rewarded were doing siginificantly better in life than those who had not.
Historical evidence confirms the accuracy of the above findings, as we often hear successful people recount how they had to deny themselves certain pleasures and also sacrifice many wants and needs, until they reached their goals.
B. Persistence
The ability to commit oneself to long term pursuit of a valued goal in the face of discouragement and deprivation is another strong indicator of a person’s degree of EI.
I happen to believe too many people that many people lack this particular quality, and most who do often also lack the earlier mentioned ability to delay gratification.
In other words, they are inter related.
The ability to persist involves carrying on with the chosen task(s) in pursuit of one’s set goal(s), regardless of the difficulties one may encounter in doing so.
What I find often happens with most people is that they assume – often unconsciously – that they have a say in how long they will need to persist before they succeed.
Most will not admit it when asked, but they betray the fact that they think so in the way they react to prolonged adversity.
The truth is that it is NOT up to any of us to decide how long it should take, or how hard or difficult it will be to arrive at success.
There are universal laws guiding achievement and they are applied impartially, but in consonance with the abilities/capacity of each person. As a result no one ever gets tested beyond his/her inborn ability to cope with the challenge visited on him/her.
Therefore if you find yourself confronted with adversity in any form, no matter how intimidating, KNOW that the Creator allowed it to reach you because He KNOWS that He has put in you what it takes to beat it.
Be inspired by that knowledge – and take action based on it to defeat any adversity that comes your way.
Anyone can LEARN to develop and use these abiliities, on his/her own, or with the help of a competent other e.g teacher, coach or mentor.
What’s more, the learning can happen at any age, and during any phase of life.
The implication therefore is that a child can be helped to develop these abilities (and others making up EI) so that s/he arrives adulthood adequately equipped to deal with the inevitable facets of adversity s/he will pass through, such as delays, disappointments, setback and outright failures (aka temporary defeat).
Daniel Goleman in his book “Emotional Imtelligence” recommended that educational institiutions incorporate teachings desinged to inculcate the various dimensions of this meta ability into learners, so they can enter the real world better rounded, and more capable of succeeding in life an any area of endeavour they choose to venture.
I agree 100%
The 2 abilities discussed above have helped many otherwise ordinary, relatively ungifted persons achieve truly extraordinary feats in various areas of endeavour.
So many unschooled or poorly schooled persons have climbed to unprecedented heights of achievement by making use of them.
Well known examples include Thomas Alva Edison and Henry Ford.
But if you look around in your own society I’m sure you will find more familiar examples. In my country Nigeria for example, the case of Shina Peters the Afro Juju music maestro comes to mind.
At age 8 he quit school and followed his passion for playing music by working as a house boy for Chief Ebenezer Obey – among other difficult roles, just to achieve his dream.
Today he is recognized as the inventor of his own genre of music and posesses wealth that enables him provide gainful employment to many who are much better schooied than he is!
Many other examples abound. Any persons who take the pains to learn and appy EI in their daily lives will end up as role models or examples for others to emulate or refer to.
Related Articles
1. What Being Emotionally Intelligent Does Not Mean
2. Become A Habitual Peak Performer – Learn How To Get Into Flow …
3. Are You A Social Chameleon? (Read This To Find Out
You’re reading Why Schools Need to Teach Emotional Intelligence [Hint: Your Success In Life – Academic Ability Matters LESS Than Your Emotional Intelligence] by Tayo Solagbade, originally posted on his Daily Self-Development (SD) Nuggets™ blog. If you loved reading this post, be sure to follow Tayo on Twitter, Facebook, and Google+.
You may also wish to check out his growing library of tutorial and demonstration videos on Youtube. Click here, to download over 10 resources to boost your personal and work related productivity.
IMPORTANT NOTE:
On 4th May 2014, Tayo’s 9 year old domain (Spontaneousdevelopment dot com), was taken over by Aplus.net. Within a few days however, Tayo used his advanced self-taught web development skills to build (and move his website contents into) a SUPERIOR “reincarnation” at http://www.tayosolagbade.com.
Most URLs bearing the old domain name appearing in search engines should now work if “spontaneousdevelopment.com” is replaced with “tayosolagbade.com”. If you experience any difficulties finding a page or document, email Tayo at tksola dot com.
Click “Tayo, What Happened to SpontaneousDevelopmentDotCom?” to read a detailed narrative about how the above event occurred :-))
Here’s an article Tayo wrote, to inspire others to defy adversity, and bounce back to even greater reckoning at what they do EVERY time:
Succeed by Emerging from Adversity Like a Phoenix (TayoSolagbade.com launches extra Hosting plan with FREE Web Marketing!)
And he wrote the one below, to explain why losing a domain name, no matter how old NO LONGER determines your online success or otherwise:
A Proven Strategy to Find Profitable Buyers Regardless of Your Domain Name
Source: ExcelVB
